X_ual’s trainee warriors Willknot were first up, lurching into a cover of Staind’s "Mudshovel". The four-piece mixed it up nicely, combining Deftones, Limp Bizkit and Soulfly tunes with three of their own – "Martyr", "Zenith" and "Defining The Art Of Defining". They may well have played "Scenes Of My Rage" as well – our reporting team were lashing into Coors and Carling at the time, and hence their judgement may have been slightly impaired. Murt_slip ambled up to join the boys for their finale, Slipknot’s "Surfacing". The afore-mentioned Des Moines nontet are known for attacking each other during their blistering live shows. Willknot went one better in the masochism stakes, with frontman Simon launching into a spectacular flop onto their beer rider. After the casualties were attended to, the pups joined the crowd out front, breaking open their second flagons, and embarking on a course of self-destruction that X_ual himself could not have scripted for them. Tri-Kaya plugged in shortly after, and broke into "Fear". We think. Again, beer and beer, and the fact that Joey spent more time goading the crowd than introducing the songs. "Full Circle" was its usual dark self, before Babar rendered his geetar useless by breaking a string. And whereas brothers in riff Jimmy and Max Cavelera could easily manage with such a depleted string supply, the dreaded ‘Rothery boy was having none of it. "How would a drummer play without a kick drum?", he asked. A good point. After a prolonged period of nothingness, SuperDeck swooped to save the day, phoning in his impending arrival with the SabbathStroker in tow. To smooth the overall order, gym slip… decided to swap slots, and kicked slowly into "Cold Plate", before launching a bouncey "Den : I Know" from their instruments. Hiccups would arrive in the form of stage-invading Willknot members, who cocked the middle breakdown to "Pigz" up completely. The def ME -inspired "I.B.A.S. (Intelligent Body Assembly System)" was given its virginal airing, complete with chug chug ending. They decided to include the full version of "No Rules (Just Alcohol)" after a lengthy absence from the setlist, and quickly discovered that nobody remembered how to play it. Dave and O’Connor continued their marvellous lens work, and we await the fruits of their labour with hands on cocks. Finally, Tri-Kaya took over once more, and finished their set of good time grooves. "Scrape #8" was requested, and duly slotted in. O’Connor ignored the baying catcalls from the crowd (and also the fact that his wandering percussion meant that the song had to be restarted), and remained behind Enda’s kit, joining the usual pupspects for "Kaoiwas". How and ever, that wasn’t the end of it. Juice, Joe and P led the crowd into the garage for a selction of Slayer, Maiden, Chilis and Sabbath tunes. Willknot were completely gee-eyed at this stage, hurling cans, food and each other around the venue. Dinny arrived with the first trays of food, and was hailed for soundness above and beyond the call of duty. Pretty soon, the shit was dismantled (around the still-jamming mooks), and sundry parentals arrived to lug the crowds Shed-wards. Cue one long night of piss-drinking, backdrop-thwarting, elaborate tattoos, Beastie Boys, Buckfast and beer.