Having been such a tremendous succes at Hallowe'en, the 2 boys were offered the opportunity to broadcast from Ballydung on December 25th and 26th, introducing programmes, and educating the masses. On Christmas Day itself, Podge fooled his brother into thinking that it was still Christmas Eve. This way, there was no need for buying presents, as Rodge would miss the great day entirely. Podge himself declared his hatred of the season. (See also Den Christmas Crisis 1 & 2). Poor Rodge fell for it completely, babbling excitedly about having a "real Christmas", like the ones they had when their parents were still alive. The 2 performed their linking duties well, introducing "the yellow people" (Simpsons), "the green people" (Gremlins), and "Ball Talk with Stumpy and Piles" (Match Of The Day). Podge would later express a desire to ring RTE to inform them they were "shitehawks" for torturing them with football.
Podge blamed the EEC for the £30 price tag on their poxy tree. George Michael took over as the fairy on top of the scrawny fir. Podge continued to ruin his brother's hopes by speaking of Mad Reindeer Disease, which had led to Santa being sued as a result of the reindeer falling through rooves and getting sliced up in aeroplane propellers. Rodge sighed, and mentioned the "20 year old malt" uisce beatha he was going to leave out for the bearded one. Podge retracts, remembering Santa's magical reindeer - Adolf, Snorkel and Bosco, who had escaped the killer disease. He then spends some time puking having accidently gorged himself on Granny's mulled phlegm.
The 2 then introduced their special Christmas Scare At Bedtime. Refusing to swap presents, they bought gifts for themselves. Rodge got himself a "surprise", which turned out to be socks. Podge treated himself to Fester & Áilin's "Raging Horns" Alpine album. He introduces their Christmas single -
"There's a dead man up the chimney,
Some call him Old Saint Nick,
We shot him up the arse,
And poked him with a stick.
Christmas is cancelled,
Old White Beard is dead,
We tried to pull him down,
We'll have to burn him down instead."
The accompanying video saw Áilin in full combat gear, pursuing Santa with pistols, Samurai swords, a bazooka, and eventually chasing the bearded fecker in an armoured vehicle.
Later, Podge spent a ridiculously long time asking Rodge if he was making the tea. Each reply was "no". Eventually, Podge got on the blower to the North Pole, informing Santa that his brother refused to make the tea. To which Rodge sidled out of the bed muttering "I'm making the tea. I'm making the tea".
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